Great nations write their autobiographies in three manuscripts, the book
of their deeds, the book of their words and the book of their art. Not one of these books
can be understood unless we read the two others, but of the three the only trustworthy one
is the last.
...at certain epochs man has felt conscious of something about himself
- body and spirit - which was outside the day to day struggle for existence.
Vigour, energy, vitality: all the great civilizations - or civilizing
epochs - have had a weight of energy behind them. People sometimes think that
civilization consists in fine sensibilities and good conversation and all that. These
can be among the agreeable results of civilization, but they are not what make a
civilization, and society can have these amenities and yet be dead and rigid.
The dull mind rises to truth through that which is material.
He who approaches the temple of the Muses without inspiration,
in the belief that craftsmanship alone suffices, will remain a bungler and his
presumptuous poetry will be obscured by the songs of the maniacs.
She could see it all so clearly, so commandingly, when she looked:
it was when she took her brush in hand that the whole thing changed. It was in that moment's
flight between the picture and her canvas that the demons set on her who often brought her
to the verge of tears and made this passage from conception to work as dreadful as any down
a dark passage for a child. Such she often felt herself -- struggling against terrific odds
to maintain her courage; to say: "But this is what I see; this is what I see," and so to
clasp some miserable remnant of her vision to her breast, which a thousand forces did their
best to pluck from her. And it was then too, in that chill and windy way, as she began to
paint, that there forced themselves upon her other things, her own inadequacy, her
insignificance, keeping house for her father off the Brompton Road, and had much ado to
control her impulse to fling herself (thank Heaven she had always resisted so far) at
Mrs. Ramsay's knee and say to her-but what could one say to her? "I'm in love with you?"
No, that was not true. "I'm in love with this all," waving her hand at the hedge, at the
house, at the children.
Taking out a pen-knife, Mr Bankes tapped the canvas with the bone handle.
What did she wish to indicate by the triangular purple shape, "just there"? he asked.
It was Mrs Ramsay reading to James, she said. She knew his objection- that no one could tell
it for a human shape. But she had made no attempt at likeness, she said. For what reason had
she introduced them then? he asked. Why indeed?-except that if there, in that corner, it was
bright, here, in this, she felt the need of darkness. Simple, obvious, commonplace, as it was,
Mr Bankes was interested. Mother and child then-objects of universal veneration, and in this
case the mother was famous for her beauty-might be reduced, he pondered, to a purple shadow
without irreverence.But the picture was not of them, she said. Or, not in his sense. There
were other senses too in which one might reverence them. By a shadow here and a light there,
for instance. Her tribute took that form if, as she vaguely supposed, a picture must be a
tribute. A mother and child might be reduced to a shadow without irreverence. A light here
required a shadow there."
Quickly, as if she were recalled by something over there, she turned
to her canvas. There it was-her picture. Yes, with all its greens and blues, its lines running
up and across, its attempt at something. It would be hung in the attics, she thought; it
would be destroyed. But what did that matter? she asked herself, taking up her brush again.
She looked at the steps; they were empty; she looked at her canvas; it was blurred. With a
sudden intensity, as if she saw it clear for a second, she drew a line there, in the centre.
It was done; it was finished. Yes, she thought, laying down her brush in extreme fatigue, I
have had my vision. - Excerpts from "To the Lighthouse"
